The Advantage of Listening More

Listening more can be a scary thing. If you listen more, you may fear that you will not be heard. You may feel that people will walk all over you.

A few weeks ago, I was having similar thoughts. I was seeing some ways that I should listen more, and I had a hard time embracing them. I had similar fears.

But the Bible is clear: “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry . . .” (James 1:19).

One thing I noticed about myself was that I often can think about other things when people talk. Sometimes I am planning how the conversation should go. At other times, people say something that evokes an idea that I then want to think about or share.

The thought occurred to me in light of this, what if I stopped doing this? What if I just listened and didn’t worry about where the conversation would go? What if I just focused on what people said and received them passively?

My first thought was that I would lose something of myself. I did fear that I would not be heard or that I would not be able to speak or that I would lose my own thoughts.

In spite of this, I tried it. I just said that I would do my best to only listen and not formulate a response until the person was done speaking. It was an interesting experience.

Here’s what I found. I listened more, and I heard more. I learned more. I laughed more. And, I realized that I would still get to share my ideas. After I listened to people, people were more ready to listen to me. When people felt heard, they were more ready to listen. So, I had no problem sharing my own ideas.

In short, by listening more, I hadn’t lost anything and had gained much.

Besides talking with people, I realized that I often don’t listen to God. When I read the Bible, my mind wanders. The words evoke a thought. I can look at all the words or hear them without listening to them. I can even think of other things while I am reading out loud.

But you know what? Now that I am listening more, I am hearing more.

This is important because there is much more outside me that I need to learn than what I have inside me. Listening is the beginning of wisdom. It is an openness to receiving reality, God, and other people that will enable us to really grow.

The Passover and Politics

Without doubt, the guilt of Egypt in oppressing the people of Israel was great. The Egyptians enslaved the people of Israel and even sought to wipe them out as a people. This oppression cried out for God’s judgment and redemption.

In this story, we have clear good guys and bad guys. Israel–the good guys. Egypt–the bad guys.

Only the Passover teaches us something different. When God announced the 10th plague, the death of the firstborn, He said that both the Israelites and the Egyptians were liable to judgment. Any house that did not have the blood of the lamb applied to it would be liable to the judgment of God.

The only way that Israel would avoid the plague was to apply the blood of the lamb. “The blood will be a sign for you on the houses where you are, and when I see the blood, I will pass over you. No destructive plague will touch you when I strike Egypt” (Exodus 12:12). This was the only way that Israel would avoid the plague.

This liability to judgment was so real that after Israel went into the wilderness, they had to “pay” for the redemption of their firstborn. The tribe of the Levites was dedicated to the Lord in the place of the firstborn of all Israel. When a count revealed that there were more firstborn than Levites, God did not say, “close enough.” The Israelites paid the difference.

We must remember that Israel was dealing with a political issue. It was an issue of power and oppression.

When we are dealing with political issues, nothing is easier than to divide the various sides into good guys and bad guys. This is not totally wrong. The oppressor has great guilt, and power can defend evil. When this is the case, it is our duty to stand up against oppression and evil. Continue reading “The Passover and Politics”

An Essential Summary of Our Book of Church Order (Presbyterian Church in America)

Our denomination has a book that governs the operation of our church on all levels. Personally, I think it is probably too long and complicated, even though I agree with the principles in it. I think we would be better served to simply have something like the following. This is a summary of our Book of Church Order that I use to give a simple explanation of what I believe are all the key points of the book.

The System of Government of the Church

Church Government:

  1. Jesus Christ is the Head of the Church. He defines the government, worship, doctrine, and ethics of the Church.
  2. The church of Jesus Christ consists of all true believers everywhere.
  3. All who believe are called to be members of local churches.
  4. The local church is a community of professing believers and their children who gather together under the leadership of ministers and elders in order to proclaim the gospel to the world, mutually encourage and build one another up, and worship God together.
  5. The official leadership of the church consists in the elders and deacons of the church.
  6. Some elders are called to devote themselves to the teaching ministry of the church and take a leading role among the elders and are generally called ministers.
  7. The deacons oversee the physical operations of the church and receive and distribute gifts to the poor.
  8. Churches should seek official relations with each other for mutual accountability and ministry. In our system of government, the regional community of churches is called a presbytery, and the national (or continental) community is called the General Assembly.
  9. These elders gather together in order to govern the local church or churches in common. These gatherings are called the Session (local), the Presbytery (regional), and General Assembly (national).
  10. No one can simply become an officer of the church by their own choosing but must be lawfully ordained.
  11. The ordination of all officers consists in an election by the congregation or other calling body, training and examination by other officers, and an installation or solemn setting aside of the individual to that office.
  12. The relationship between an officer and a congregation can be dissolved by a vote of the congregation and confirmation of the ordaining body.
  13. The congregation does not govern but should approve all major financial decisions and can be called upon for advice or vote on other matters. The congregation must elect all officers governing it.

Church Discipline:

  1. The purpose of discipline is to glorify Christ, build up the congregation, and help the subject of discipline.
  2. The governing body with jurisdiction over a member or minister can and should look into any matter that could become a scandal to the church.
  3. Individuals may seek to resolve issues of concern through church courts, but they must first seek to win their brother.
  4. When a matter cannot be resolved informally, the governing body should enter into a process of careful inquiry into a matter (or trial).
  5. If a governing body enters into process and finds a person guilty, then they may impose a censure.
  6. A censure is either a rebuke, suspension from the Lord’s Supper, suspension from office, or excommunication.
  7. If someone comes and confesses, the governing body may impose a censure, but it must be clear that a person actually intends to confess for this end.
  8. If someone tries to simply remove himself from the roll of the church, then the governing body should make clear the consequences of not being part of the visible church and seek to dissuade them.
  9. If someone disagrees with the action of any governing body over them, then that person may make seek to convince that body that it was wrong through a complaint.
  10. If a complaint is rejected by a governing body, then the person who made the complaint can take that complaint to a higher body.

The Benefit of Not Talking in Bulldoze Mode

Sometimes I talk in bulldoze mode. It’s not something I want to do. It’s something I can do without thinking. It’s something I want to change.

What is bulldoze mode? It’s a way of trying to force your opinion through. You get in a mode of talking where you make it clear to people that if they contradict you or even try to nuance what you are saying, they are going to have a fight on their hands. You may start interrupting. You may speak more loudly. You may just say something in a way that warns people against any challenge.

Bulldoze mode is connected with anxiety. You may feel anxiety that something you feel is important won’t be heard. You may feel like you are no longer safe to share your opinion or that you are not respected. When anxiety goes up, people can either become completely silent, withdraw, talk to someone else, try to fix it, act helpless, or seek to bulldoze an opinion through.

The advantage of going into bulldoze mode is that it does release some anxiety. When you prepare yourself to fight, you feel like you are doing something productive. There is a payback of some sort, or no one would do it.

The problem is that people may not feel safe talking to you. They may not want to be with you or work with you. They may feel more comfortable talking behind your back. Continue reading “The Benefit of Not Talking in Bulldoze Mode”

Key Biblical/Theological Distinctions for Thinking Clearly About Theology

Over the years, I have come to realize that people can be talking past each other in theology. One reason is that they do not distinguish the ways that words are used. This is not always easy to figure out. The Church spent several hundred years learning how to talk about who Jesus is and how that fits in with our understanding of God. Over the years the church has sought to clarify these matters. If we listen carefully, we might be able to avoid some of these pitfalls ourselves. Our church has a lengthy document that explains what we are understanding in the Bible called the Westminster Confession of Faith. You can ready it here. For me, I have come to realize that the key to this lengthy document is understanding about 20 theological distinctions. Here is my list.

  1. Being & Persons: God is one being, but He exists in three persons: Father, Son, & Holy Spirit.
  2. Primary & Secondary Causes: God is the primary cause of all things, but man is a real, though secondary, cause.
  3. Decree & Providence: Both refer to God’s government of everything that happens, but the decree is God’s planning of everything while providence is when He actually brings it about.
  4. Guilt & Corruption of Sin: When we sin, we become guilty, i.e., liable to punishment, but sin also corrupts us, i.e., makes us worse people.
  5. Covenant of Works/Covenant of Grace: The covenants are the terms of our relationship with God. The covenant of works required perfect obedience to have a life with God. The covenant of grace requires faith in Jesus Christ and His perfect work in order to have life with God. It is “do this and live” over against “believe, and you will be saved.”
  6. Continue reading “Key Biblical/Theological Distinctions for Thinking Clearly About Theology”