“Put off your old self . . . and put on the new.” That’s one of the central teachings of the Christian faith.
Does this just mean “be better”? You could take it that way.
And, of course, there is one sense in which God commands us to be better. It is always our moral obligation from God to be better: to love more, to hate less, to be more kind, and to forgive.
There is also some advantage to a reminder to “be better.” How often do I think, for example, that I’m supposed to pursue “compassion” or avoid “slander”? It’s good for me to be reminded that this is what I’m supposed to do.
The problem is that I fail. The commandment just isn’t enough to get me where I need to be. It’s more like the New Year’s resolution that I continue for a week and then forget (and usually don’t do perfectly even that one week!).
Further, the Bible teaches that salvation and transformation is a gift of God’s grace from first to last. How do we square this with the call to “be better”?
One way people have understood this is to recognize that the commandment is good but that we need God’s grace to fulfill it. As Augustine said, “Command what you will, and give what you command.”
I do believe that this is taught in Scripture. However, I’m not sure that this is what the Apostle Paul is after in Ephesians 4:22–24 when he tells us to put off the old self and put on the new.
I take his command more like this: accept the work of God’s grace in your life and avail yourselves of everything God provides in order to make you what He calls you to be.
Let me suggest that this involves at least 5 things.
First, confront the issue. Sin is not simple. It is complex. It involves a way of thinking, wrong desires, and even ignorance (see Eph. 4:17–19). We need to do more than look at the outward action. We need to consider where our heart is, what our mindset is, and what our thinking is.
Two ways that I have found particularly helpful for discerning the pattern of sin are to look at my strong emotions and desires. When we feel strong negative emotions like anger or anxiety, it is an opportunity for us to examine what’s going on under the hood. When our desires take over us and lead us in wrong directions, it’s a good idea to ask, what is the source of these desires? Why am I wanting this recreation, relationship, or reaction so much?
This consideration will help us see more clearly how we need God’s grace to work in our lives.
Second, convert our thinking. It’s not just about behavior. It’s what’s in our hearts and minds that is the issue. Paul begins his discussion of the old self in this passage by saying there is “futile thinking.” The new self involves being renewed “in the attitude of our minds” (Eph. 4:23).
For example, if we think our acceptance is based on what other people think of us, we will be continually frustrated (futile thinking!). If we believe our acceptance is based on God’s view of us, we are open to the peace that is available to us in Jesus Christ (Eph. 1:7). So, we convert our thinking by keeping in mind all the things that God has said about His grace in Ephesians 1–3, that we have “every spiritual blessing in Christ.”
Third, connect to God’s grace. In the first part of Ephesians, the Apostle Paul speaks of God “enlightening our hearts” and “giving us power to see.” Transformation is a gift of God’s grace.
However, there are places where God’s grace is flowing. We call these “the means of grace.” They include the Word of God, the sacraments, prayer, and people. If we want to experience God’s grace, we should humbly make use of the means that God has given to experience His grace.
Fourth, continue in grace-empowered effort. It is important that this not come first, but it plays a part. I believe we should try hard to be compassionate and kind, but this is not always the effort that is needed. Sometimes the effort is working on re-shaping our thinking, making time to spend with Jesus, devoting ourselves to prayer, and taking the risk of connecting with people who can help us.
Fifth, conform to the pattern of Christ. It is important for us to remember that the call to transformation is always directed toward Christ as the power for transformation and as the example to which transformation will conform. “Walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself for us” (Eph. 5:2).
If we just look at ourselves, we might not have any hope for transformation. Looking to Christ and the power of His resurrection, we have tremendous hope for change! We don’t have to rest in the same old patterns. By God’s grace, we can experience the grace of out with the old and in with the new. Christ is risen!
There are some things we can learn fairly quickly like “Don’t throw a rock at a baby skunk.”