Tag: patience

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The Cardinal Virtues for the Christian Life, Part 5: Resolute Endurance (Fortitude)

In the 1920s, Clarence Keith wanted to leave the United States and serve as a missionary in South Africa. In those days, you had to mail in paperwork, get visas approved, and hope everything turned out alright when you arrived at the boat (not the plane!) to cross the ocean.

Clarence arrived in New York a couple of days before his departure, but the visa was not ready. The trip was cancelled. He returned to his home in southern Indiana to contemplate his next steps.

Roberta McMillan had attended God’s School of the Bible at the same time as Clarence. She also applied to be a missionary. She was refused because the organization did not want to send her as a single woman.

She also returned home to contemplate her next steps.

When you want to do something big in the world, setbacks and opposition are inevitable. What will you do when you hit a wall?

To keep going forward, you need resolute endurance. That’s the fourth cardinal virtue. It is sometimes called fortitude or courage. It is the ability to keep going and continue doing good when things get hard.

How the Bible Describes This
Resolute endurance is a common theme in the Bible. In living the Christian life and seeking to do good works, you will face opposition. You need the strength of endurance to keep going.

Jesus is the model here. He set before Himself a great goal: the redemption of the world. That mission meant opposition and the cross (Heb. 12:1–3). We are to consider His example and prepare ourselves to follow it.

One word the Bible uses for this virtue is patience. People develop at different rates, process things differently, and sometimes oppose us. The Apostle Paul encouraged the Thessalonians to recognize these differences and respond wisely. He said, “warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak . . .” (1 Thess. 5:14). But then he added a universal command: “be patient with all.”

Getting people to work together takes patience. That is the fourth virtue applied to ordinary relationships.

Another biblical word for this virtue is perseverance. It refers to our ability to keep doing good in the face of opposition.

Jesus said, “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you” (Luke 6:27).

Some people hear this as a reaction: wait until someone harms you, then try to do them good. But I think Jesus intends something deeper: do as much good as you can, and don’t let the evil actions of others deter you from continuing to do good—even toward those who wrong you.

Paul captured this beautifully: “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good” (Rom. 12:21).

That is the principle. Keep doing good no matter what.

Why? To let evil triumph? No. Ultimately, to overcome it with good.

This is where hope comes in. Hope is the oxygen of resolute endurance.

The Need for Hope
Consider Jesus again. What kept Him going?

A vision of the good: “For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Heb. 12:2).

We do not endure suffering for suffering’s sake. We endure suffering for the sake of the good.

How can we have hope? Let’s consider the hope we have for ourselves and the hope we can have for the good we seek to do in the world.

First, what hope do we have for ourselves when we face hardship? That God will turn it for our good.

The Apostle Paul explains this promise: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28).

Some people hear this and think: God will bring good out of this, but we do not know what that good is. While it is true we cannot see everything God is doing, Paul actually tells us what that good is: “For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son . . .” (Rom. 8:29).

The good that God is working in His people is transformation—making them more like Jesus.

This purpose gives us hope when life is hard. In fact, it allows us to rejoice even in suffering.

Earlier in Romans, Paul wrote: “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” (Rom. 5:3–4).

This is something people already know from experience: going through hard things can make you stronger. You grow. You learn.

That is Paul’s point. The greatest heroes pass through the greatest trials. Great threats often produce great victories.

But in this case, victory is not uncertain. In Christ, it is assured. That is why there is real hope.

What about the good we seek to do in the world? Can we hope that our efforts will matter?

Yes.

Paul explains the principle this way: “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Gal. 6:9).

This promise does not refer only to individual growth. It refers to the good we do for others.

Paul continues: “Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers” (Gal. 6:10).

Doing good is not only good in itself. It also produces results. It makes an impact.

This is the vision we must keep before us when we encounter setbacks. Continuing to pursue the good will be good for us, good for others, and bring glory to God.

The Resolute Endurance of Clarence & Roberta
Clarence Keith and Roberta McMillan shared their experiences with each other through letters. Over time, they came to a conclusion.

They should go to the mission field—and they should go together as husband and wife.

About a year after their initial setback, they set off by boat for what was then Swaziland. They made the difficult journey to this landlocked nation and began a mission.

They carried sweet potatoes and biltong (a form of beef jerky) into the bush on long treks and shared the Gospel.

They raised children—eight of them, in fact. They milked cows and later had their children help milk them to provide milk for the family. They raised their own food. They ordered clothing patterns from the Sears catalogue and made clothes for their children.

Decades later, God called them to another mission in what was then Southern Rhodesia. God provided funds for a medical mission that is still operating today in what is now Zambia.

What if they had given up?

None of that good would have been done.

They could have enjoyed a comfortable life in America, no doubt. But the greater good would have remained undone.

I also would not be here, because they are my great-grandparents.

In 2014, I preached a sermon on legacy to more than 100 descendants and spouses of Clarence and Roberta.

That moment has remained a constant reminder: do not give up—even when life is hard, even when obstacles appear.

It is a living testimony to God’s promise: we shall reap, if we faint not.

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Anxiety, Pride, Relationships, and Redemption: A Tale of Sarah, Abraham, and Hagar

According to the Christian faith, the fundamental human problem is not lack of material resources, unjust government, or lack of education. It is the disruption of the relationship between God and human beings. Out of this disruption, flow all of the addictions, injustices, and abuses of human life.

The Bible gives this fundamental problem a name. It calls it sin. Sin is the conditions and actions of being out of accord with what we ought to be and what we ought to do. It is first and foremost about a wrong relationship with God, but it disrupts human relationships as well.

Sin is worthy of condemnation, but when we look at it more closely, we often feel sympathy for those in sin. Why is this? Because sin is complex, not simple.

An insight I received from the study of American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr was that sin is rooted in anxiety. He said, anxiety arises out of our ability to see the world and its threats to our well-being combined with our inability to do much about them. This is not sin in itself, but it becomes the occasion for sin.

A quick perusal of the sins of the Bible will show you that this is the case. Sin arises out of people’s anxious response to threats. Cain has anxiety about his standing with God, and so he kills Abel. Joseph’s brothers have anxiety over their relationship with their father, and so they sell their favored brother into slavery. Pharaoh has anxiety over the growth of the children of Israel and so enslaves them. The people of Israel have anxiety over Pharaoh, provision, and status and so complain against the Lord. And on and on it goes.

There are two responses to the threats of this world. We can trust the Lord, or we can try to come up with our own solution. This latter response is pride. This pride that we can solve our own problems and are bigger than we are leads to disruption and dissolution.

In this series, I am going to look at one example of this. We will see how sin grows out of anxiety. The prideful response to anxiety leads to choices and actions that disrupt the family. But the good news is that God does not leave Sarah, Abraham, or Hagar in sin. He makes Himself known, and this brings a healing element into the relationship.

Sarah’s Anxiety
“She had borne him no children.” Some people do not want children, but for those who do, how painful it is to go through this experience! Continue reading “Anxiety, Pride, Relationships, and Redemption: A Tale of Sarah, Abraham, and Hagar”

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Joining and Loving Specific Communities (Study of Romans, Part 8: Romans 14–16)

Key Thought: We grow in joy, peace, and hope by joining and loving specific communities.

Note: How do we find joy, hope, and peace in our lives? The Apostle Paul’s letter to the Romans is all about that. He teaches that we do it by having more faith, hope, and love. In the 8th part of this study, we consider how Paul wrote to a specific community of Christians who had a lot of differences. How would they come together in love? This is the 8th of an 8 part study of Paul’s letter to the Roman Christians. You can read part 1 here, part 2 here, part 3 here, part 4 here, part 5 here, part 6 here, and part 7 here.

Paul, as a Christian missionary, took it for granted that when people accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior they would join specific communities in which they would praise and worship God, help each other grow, and serve one another. This is what we often call church, which simply means a gathering. Remember that the whole goal of this letter is that people would glorify God together (Romans 15:5–6). How would they learn to do this? They would gather in specific communities and build relationships based on the practices of worshiping God, personal growth, and serving Him.

As we noted in the last post, this can be hard. Human relationships are our greatest source of joy and pain. Love is a risk. It is worth it, but it often hurts.

Loving is also hard because people are different. They do things differently than we do. They come from a different place than we do. They come from different cultures than we do. They have different opinions than we do.

In spite of this, Paul was successful in building communities consisting of people of vastly different cultures, backgrounds, and social status. It’s really an amazing accomplishment. Over the past few years, I have built many relationships with both Latino and white Americans. I have tried to bring them together. I have been surprised at how hard it was to do so. The whites would arrive at 5 for a party and would leave at 8. The Latinos would not even arrive until 8. It was a simple difference, they both did what was natural to them, and this made it harder for them to come together. This is just one minor example of many differences people can have. My small efforts have made me appreciate what Paul did in bringing Jews and Gentiles together in one community.

What Paul accomplished was not easy. Paul and other leaders in the church had to constantly remind the people what it meant to love a community well. I want us to consider here five principles for loving a community well that Paul explains in Romans 14–16.

How to Love and Bless a Specific Community
1. Start with acceptance. “Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God” (Romans 15:7). Community begins with acceptance. We ought to have a basic stance of welcoming and accepting people. How we greet each other matters. Notice that in Romans 16, Paul lists all sorts of people that he greets. This is not a minor point. These are the people who are on his heart. We should have a list like that, and it should be long. We should care about as many people as we can.

This is rooted, Paul says, in the basic truth that we already considered. God accepts us in Christ. “Accept others . . . as Christ accepted you . . .” This is the basis for community. God starts the process. He says to you, “I accept you.” How, then, can we not say that to others? We should show others in our words, acts, and face that we accept them.

2. We should think of how to please others, not ourselves. Paul says, “We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up” (Romans 15:1–2). We should develop the habit of thinking of what is good for everybody and not just ourselves. Note: this also does not mean simply pleasing the loudest, angriest, or richest. It means everybody. We should look for the interests of the community as a whole, what will be good for everybody.

That’s what Jesus did. He came to earth not to please Himself but to please others. “Christ did not please himself . . .” (Romans 15:3). The irony is that in not pleasing Himself, He reached the highest state of blessedness. As Jesus said elsewhere, “He who desires to save His life will lose it, and whoever loses His life for my sake will gain it.” This ability to please others is rooted in a deep trust that God accepts us and is making us whole and that He will do us good. If we find ourselves not able to please others, then we should go back to what we studied in the previous lessons.

3. We should tolerate differences of personality, custom, and secondary doctrines. When we join a community, we will find all sorts of differences. This is not a bad thing. It is part of the process. It will help us grow, and it will help our neighbors grow. Paul begins this discourse by saying, “Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters” (Rom. 14:1). There are many things that can be done differently. There are many things that are important but not central. Paul talks here about foods. He had an opinion about what the Bible teaches. However, he says that there should be tolerance for these differences, even though he says it is a matter of truth. He recognized that this was not something that was of first importance (see 1 Cor. 15:1–11).

4. We should not become a stumbling-block for others. We should be careful not do those things that will harm others. This means that we avoid putting burdens on people that they are not ready to bear. It may also mean that we don’t flaunt our freedom in a way that some people are not ready for. When we make a big deal out of a minor issue, then we can be a stumbling-block. When we don’t take care of major issues, then we can also be a stumbling-block. The point is to think of others as well as ourselves. As Paul puts it, “Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister” (Rom. 14:13).

5. We should aim at helping people grow. We do not want people to stay where they are. We want to help them grow. Growth is a process. You can help a plant grow by watering it, fertilizing it, and pruning it, but growth has to occur through its own internal processes. You can’t rush that. So it is with people. That should be our aim, and we should recognize that it will take time. We should always be thinking about how we can help people grow in faith, hope, and love because that is the most important thing for people to grown in. “Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification” (Rom. 14:19). Edification means building them up. We should engage in all measures that will help people grow.

Conclusion
When I was serving in Spearfish, South Dakota, we put a strong emphasis on the secondary doctrines of Scripture. When new people came to the church, we emphasized these points strongly. Before they became members, they would have to know a lot about the details of the teaching of Scripture, as we conceived of it.

Eventually, the church as a whole came to a recognition that this approach was wrong. We were putting a stumbling-block in the way of the weak and the seeker. We needed to focus on the simplicity of the Gospel and help people grow from there. We repented. It was amazing to see new people come, departed children return, and current members feel more welcome. When we did this, we were thinking about the community as a whole. It did lead to greater joy and peace. We were aligning ourselves with Christ’s mission.

We are made to live in community. We will have to work at it and continually challenge ourselves but loving a community well is a way to greater joy, peace, and hope in our lives.

Questions for Building Your Own Lesson

  1. How did Paul build and envision the community that believers would be a part of?
  2. What dangers did Paul see that would inhibit the building of community?
  3. What characteristics and actions did people need to develop in order to love the community well?
  4. What were the motivations that Paul gave to encourage people to love well?

Questions for Application

  1. Are you a part of a specific community? What has that been like for you?
  2. Where do you need to adjust your way of participating in a community?
  3. Do you have a list of people you love and care about like the Apostle Paul did in Rom. 16?

Thank you for taking the time to read this study. I hope that it was a blessing to you. If you enjoyed it, consider sharing it on social media or subscribing to this blog in the box below. I would also love to hear your feedback and experiences about being in community in the comment section below. I hope I will see you here again.

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Photo by Kylie Lugo on Unsplash

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The Benefit of Not Talking in Bulldoze Mode

Sometimes I talk in bulldoze mode. It’s not something I want to do. It’s something I can do without thinking. It’s something I want to change.

What is bulldoze mode? It’s a way of trying to force your opinion through. You get in a mode of talking where you make it clear to people that if they contradict you or even try to nuance what you are saying, they are going to have a fight on their hands. You may start interrupting. You may speak more loudly. You may just say something in a way that warns people against any challenge.

Bulldoze mode is connected with anxiety. You may feel anxiety that something you feel is important won’t be heard. You may feel like you are no longer safe to share your opinion or that you are not respected. When anxiety goes up, people can either become completely silent, withdraw, talk to someone else, try to fix it, act helpless, or seek to bulldoze an opinion through.

The advantage of going into bulldoze mode is that it does release some anxiety. When you prepare yourself to fight, you feel like you are doing something productive. There is a payback of some sort, or no one would do it.

The problem is that people may not feel safe talking to you. They may not want to be with you or work with you. They may feel more comfortable talking behind your back. Continue reading “The Benefit of Not Talking in Bulldoze Mode”

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4 Tools to Help People Move Forward (Part 1)

Our default is to lead by reaction. We see something we don’t like in people, and then we react to it. We criticize. We complain. We attack. We withdraw. We show our displeasure and hope people will change. That’s leadership by reaction. It’s all too common. We rarely stop and think and pray about situations. We just react to them. This does not do much good to us or to those we are leading.

Effective leadership requires something different. It requires thought and vision. It requires clarity on where we want to be and how we are going to get there. It requires communication of that vision and the path that people need to take. It requires connecting well with the people we want to lead.

But that’s not enough. Leaders also help people move forward on the path. How? The Apostle Paul lists four ways or four tools in his letter to the church in Thessalonica. He told the leaders in that church, “And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone” (1 Thess. 5:14). I will deal with these in the reverse order. I see the Apostle Paul as telling us: remember it’s a process, give people steps, encourage people to take those steps, and have the hard conversations.

Remember It’s a Process
One thing about reactive leadership is that it is impatient. I don’t like what you’re doing, and it needs to stop right now! This is based on a dislike of what is observed and a desire for it to be different.

However, that’s not really how humans work. Change takes time. If we are going to help people move forward, we have to remember that it’s a process. This is true not only for others. It is true for ourselves. We don’t and didn’t change in a day. Change occurs over time. It is more complex than we often think. We have a set of assumptions that govern our behavior and are wired into our bodies. This can change, but it takes place over time. Continue reading “4 Tools to Help People Move Forward (Part 1)”

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